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The following were SO IMPORTANT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD that Bryce literally could. not. wait. for us to finish our own boring adult conversation BECAUSE THE WORLD MIGHT END LISTEN TO ME NOW YOU IGNORANT FOOLS!

1.) If you were on Planet Mercury, and you took your helmet off, your head would turn INTO FIRE. Just let that absorb for a few minutes, because MAN! that is seriously not something that can wait. The world must know.

2.) Conversely, if you were on Planet Pluto, and you took your helmet off, your head would turn INTO ICE! And then, when you defrosted, you'd have the sneezes.

3.) The rings around Saturn resemble a donut. And, AND! Bryce LIKES donuts. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?!

4.) To get to Jupiter, there is apparently a "rocky path" (asteroid belt?) down which you have to slide. Huh. Who knew?


As for the swim lesson incident, we are still making calls. The director of the Y has been on vacation, and the person in charge while the director is out is the Aquatics Director, who has been in this job exactly four days. Literally. FOUR DAYS. So far, the lifeguard and instructor have been "disciplined" and the Y has "doubled" their lifeguard duty from ONE to TWO lifeguards when swim lessons are in session. I still don't think that is adequate (based on the outrageous number of swimmers in the pool when Quinn was completely unsupervised and practically drowning), and all I can do is continue to publicize the situation. John thinks it's over the top to do things like write letters to the newspaper editor and call radio stations - he thinks that the Y needs to have their cages rattled and that we should stay focused on that. In my head, I know he's right. But the vengeful Mother Bear in me wants to rip them all limb from limb and figure out every possible way to expose the incompetence, nonchalance, and horrid security reigning at a place that prides itself on its commitment to families. Clearly, my disgust and fury haven't died down despite the ice cream, tequila, and wine in which I've been trying to drown them since Tuesday.